Allowing Rest
Being able to take naps is my biggest sign that I’m in a much healthier place now.
Today, I took a 3 hour nap.
Previous me from 2 years ago would have never believed it. While I’ve been working a lot on understanding the anxiety that comes from CPTSD, it wasn’t until I discovered I’m AuDHD that I accepted how crucial rest is for me.
After a crazy weekend filled with the ups and downs of parenting, I told myself that the best thing I could do was lie down for a bit.
I was expecting an hour nap, already had a bunch of stuff planned in my head after I woke up. The laundry, the planning, the reading and editing I was going to do.
But after a couple of hours, I wiped the drool off my face and checked my phone. I willingly gave myself more time to rest because that was the kind thing to do.
Because my nervous system was overworked this weekend. Birthday parties and fractured pinkies mixed in with swim class and managing a sleepover, I was expecting myself to be exhausted.
And I’m proud because in the past I would’ve beat myself up for not being able to do it.
But, who the hell can? And who the hell wants to?
Not me, not anymore.
I just want to rest as much as possible for as long as possible whenever I can.